Hm.

I’m a teabag wishing to become a cup of aromatic tea. But being afraid to take the leap into hot water, I go around looking for people to do me the favour of dunking me instead. Yes, despite my fears of being scalded. How masochistic.

The bell curve is almost like a permanent standard. Sometimes I wonder, since there can only have so many successful people in the world, perhaps I should just live happily as a mediocrity. But I’m afraid of not living up to my potential too. As J.D. Salinger has so nicely put it, “I’m sick of not having the courage to be an absolute nobody.”

Should I sit in comfort as a teabag and forever wonder how my life would be different as tea, or should I accept the challenge and endure the hardships that is to come? The only fear in choosing the latter is again, self-doubt.

What if I’m not even a teabag to begin with? What if I’m just juice? Or milk?

I don’t want to be ruined.

Ah, the conundrum!

Inspirations have I none

FOC is over and I’m so so so so relieved it turned out pretty great. Beyond thankful for having had a team of dedicated and efficient proggies plus their unconditional support.

Two weeks into sophomore year and i’m still in holiday mood. Not at all psyched for the first vc and typo projects, but oh well that’s what I get for choosing timetable over profs. Forensics feels like a submerged iceberg. Madness is dwindling. French can kill. But electives sure are a great way for making new acquaintances. Especially when you feel like a total idiot in class and turns out, the person next to you does too. Common experiences brings people together ya.

Old yet new; an unfolding familiarity – hall, harmonica, work-study and whatnot.

I really miss updating this space with all my routine nonsense, but such time has become a luxury. Anyway the real purpose of this post is to rant about my lack of inspiration for vc. Sorry to have wasted your time. LOL. Back to work.

My man

“I hate being clever […] when you don’t really feel clever and don’t want to be clever. To sneak around and make plans and feel big about making them. I hate this feeling of thinking I’m doing right when I’m not really certain I am. Who are we, anyway? The majority?

Is that the answer? The majority is always holy, is it not? Always, always; just never wrong for one little insignificant tiny moment, is it? Never ever wrong in ten million years?

What is this majority and who are in it? And what do they think and how did they get that way and will they ever change and how the devil did I get caught in this rotten majority? I don’t feel comfortable.

Can one man be right, while all the world thinks they are right? Let’s not think about it. Let’s crawl around and act exciting and pull the trigger. There, and there!”

– Ray Bradbury