I wish that once I have decided, that I could slam the door in a person’s face for good. Without having to worry about whether I’ve hurt them. Without having to worry if I am being inconsiderate to my neighbours. Without having to explain to anyone why I did that. Without harboring any residual hope that they would turn back and knock on my door again because if they do, I am just going to let them enter, and possibly rip my house apart yet again.
I just want to do things for my personal well-being sometimes without having to feel like a selfish and horrible git.
Why is that so hard?